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Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Facing fear

For some reason or other both the book I have been reading: Karen Armstrong's The Battle for God: a history of fundamentalism and Jean Vanier's tapes that I wrote about last time, have spoken of the power of fear in us.

Fear feels like one of the most havoc-creating emotions we can experience and when we act out of fear we can do some quite dreadful things to each other. Karen's book is helping me to have some sense of why our world is so polarized. She speaks of the fear behind fundamentalism; the fear that all that I believe in, all that I hold dear, all that has given my life meaning is being destroyed by others. 

If for instance, my life is built on believing that the bible or the Koran or the Torah is truly the absolute and literal word of God then when others start to challenge this I become full of fear. The values that I hold dear are being trampled under and I begin to feel that I must try to overcome or destroy those who are doing this. I may begin to see them as agents of satan. Gradually, the gap between us seems unbridgeable. 

Is there a way out of this? Certainly not quickly or easily but if we succumb to hopelessness then we all lose.

In Jean Vanier's tapes on John's Gospel he talks about what seems to me like a small way through the barrier of fear. Jean speaks about the story that is usually called 'the woman at the well' in Chapter 4 . He  reminds us that Jesus was  speaking openly to a) a Samaritan, a people who were in fact, despised by the Jewish community and b) a woman. Women were of no great account and certainly a man alone would not have a conversation with one let alone such a deep theological one. Still that is what happened and it is typical of Jesus.

Jesus engages the woman in an increasing spiritual dialogue. In the process, he points out that he knows the woman has been married five times and is now alone. He is not using this as a rejection or a criticism but simply as a reality of who she is. Jesus accepts and loves her as she is: somewhat 'broken' but beautiful all the same.

Jean picks up this point and reminds us that for all of us there are aspects of ourselves that are broken and that we fear to be exposed. There are things, relationships, situations where we have not behaved well or from which we have been deeply hurt. We are often left with a feeling of worthlessness, rejection, anger. Jean speaks about the need for each of us to have someone who knows us as we are, deep down, in our brokenness and in our beauty. He is suggesting here that Jesus is doing that for this woman.

But what I think he is also saying is that when we can become aware in truth and acceptance of the fragility and brokenness in ourselves and then in each other, we begin to see each other not as enemies but as other human beings. We don't need to agree, we may have to act strongly but we will not act out of hatred or fear. 

Jean asks the question: why do we fear the light of truth? and he answers: because the light reveals the dark places in us. So, when we can slowly allow the light in, then in our meetings with one another  fear will slowly fade. 

Please do comment if you wish - maybe there can be a bit of a dialogue. Just click on No(or...)Comments. 

1 comment:

Cathy said...

I think we often find others threatening when they remind us of the parts of ourselves that we are uncomfortable with. So perhaps, as you say, if we can accept and forgive our own fragility and brokenness, we'll be better able to connect with others in a positive way. Also, we should remember that we change over time and our current status is affected by our history. For instance, I am now a vegan and wish everyone else was too, but I wasn't always a vegan and people who may not yet have considered the issue may yet learn about it and make the change. Instead of acting out of fear and being combative, we will do better if we can find areas of common ground and then explore our differences in a constructive way.